Ep #34 – How to Love Yourself
If you ignore your feelings & don’t look at your thinking, you’re going to experience more pressure, confusion, doubt, and believe you’re not good enough
What You’ll Learn on this Episode:
- What it means to love yourself.
- How you show up when you don’t.
- The skills to develop to love yourself.
Featured on the Show:
- What Goals Are For? – Hello, Lovely Podcast Episode #2
- My lifting coach / nutritionist – Jenny Blake
- Ready to drop your inner critic and be yourself? Work with me one-on-one.
- Join me on Instagram and tag me in all your favorite Hello, Lovely moments!
Ep #34 - How to Love Yourself
Hi beautiful, I am looking forward to sharing this topic with you. As with anything, there are multiple definitions, and I’m going to define what love yourself means - the concepts and tools I teach the women I work with, what you do when you love yourself, AND my fav, what you don’t do.
But first I’m going to tell you a couple things I’m up to. I hired a lifting coach. I am SIKED. I really want to take care of my body and health at a higher level, and now that I love my body and have a great relationship with it, I’m ALL IN for another level of learning. That’s why the brain is so cool. We are designed to keep growing. When you use goals to spice up your life and not a measure of your worth, it’s so much fun. The first thing I needed was to change my relationship with myself because I didn’t love myself or my body. That’s part of the process I teach the incredible women I work with.
Next I set a goal to lose weight already loving my body and practice tracking what I was eating. Notice I didn’t say TRY but PRACTICE. That’s a big difference we’ll talk about on another episode, and now that I have a routine I’m comfortable with, it’s the perfect time to set a new goal to add some spice. Love my body now, I’ll love it when it changes. That’s a great way to reach goals, and that’s how I teach you to do it when we work together. I’ll keep you posted on that journey as it goes.
OK, so how to love yourself. What does that mean? It’s a critical part of your life experience. Because the way you talk, treat, and think of yourself impacts how you will show up every where else. Spiritual things, family, work, goals, your body….everything. The Relationship with yourself (RWY) is YOUR filter for everything else.
Loving yourself at the most basic is knowing the value of your human life. Deep. OK, but that’s most basic. I’m going to go into more detail, and you’ll see more of how that impacts what you do and don’t do, but at the very most basic, it’s the value of your life is given. Everyone’s value is the same. We say all the time, but if you don’t love yourself (or don’t see the value of YOUR human life), you will think less of yourself than others and not in the way you want.
So this is how it shows up: You’re critical of yourself. You wonder what other people are thinking about you and usually it’s on the critical side. I’m not smart enough. I’m too old. I should know this by now. What’s wrong with me. They think I’m dumb. They must have something I don’t. I missing something. I’m not good enough. I’m a failure. OK.
So this list is long enough represent how this shows up. Side effects of this are hiding, leaving social events that you wish you could be comfortable at, overeating, overdrinking, comparison to others with resentment, and feeling a underlying anxiety or fear and not asking for help. You don’t want anyone to know the inner struggle because again, that lines up with that list - I should know or some flavor of that.
I have some good news for you. ALLL of that changes when you love yourself and see the value of your human life. Everyone’s human value is the same. Putting yourself down is optional. It’s different from having a willing spirit and wanting to do things for others so you enjoy lifting others up or doing things for others. Putting yourself down is different and completely optional.
In fact, when you love yourself, you have so much more love to give. Period. That is even in a scripture. Love your neighbor as yourself. LOVE yourself. It’s such a good thing.
Versus not loving yourself. Then it’s easy to see what can come from that. You can picture what that looks like because it’s something women experience all over the world. Not loving themselves, hating their bodies, literally bullying themselves. This is too important to let slip under a rug, pretend it’s just the way it is without something to do about it NOW. Right now.
You can love yourself now. When you do, you take care of your mental health, you don’t question your abilities, you don’t hold yourself back from things you love and are in integrity with. You aren’t critical of others or in others business because you are loving/valuing them as much as you do yourself. Do you see a pattern here?
YES! The RWY is the filter for your experience. If you ignore it, ignore your feelings, don’t look at your thinking, you’re going to experience more pressure, anxiety, confusion, doubt, and believe you’re not good enough. So no matter what goals you go after or things you change on the outside of your life, moving, jobs, vacation, food, relationships, you’re taking you with you and the RWY doesn’t change without a decision.
You have your back. You can be yourself. It doesn’t matter what other people are doing because you know what YOU’re doing.
OK, so I’m going to tell you how to do that. Because applying this skillset is how you stop beating yourself up and be yourself.
You develop the skill to: Stop beating yourself up.
Feel your emotions
Love what you have
And from that place where you are so clear and know yourself - SOLID with your values, integrity, and love what you have, you can create more. It’s such an incredible place to go after more when you already love yourself and what you have.
Like I talked about earlier with my lifting coach. I’m not doing it to be good enough. I’m doing it because it spices up my unique life, personality, goals, values, decisions. That is the gift of life we have, and you can be all up in it when you love yourself.
OK, so that’s our topic. I want to give the opportunity to use this skillset right now. Because everyday that goes by is another day being critical of yourself, holding yourself back, and feeling pressure.
All right, so you want to purchase private coaching, you’re going to go to this website,
Click on Work with Christie
Schedule your consult, and as soon as you do, you’ll get an email with all the details in your inbox on how we meet together.
OK. So sign up now, go the website. I’ll see in your consult.
THIS is the time. Let’s do it.
Love you guys so much. See you next week.